The baby arrives, the mother is exhausted and the father is still getting used to his new role. That’s when the well meaning relatives descend with their mandatory comments about the poor little infant which is still trying to find the right way to suckle its mother’s breast. It is not uncommon for me to have mothers in tears after their baby has been criticized as being too dark, too thin, not as fair as the father or the nose being too blunt. Such comments have even led to depression in some mothers.
The comments usually come from `well meaning’ relatives, who seem to forget that the woman is still vulnerable, has gone through hours of ordeal and is now sleepless and tired. Every baby is special and beautiful and I can understand the mother’s distress when someone comments about her.
Unfortunately, one cannot always stop people from talking. The best way for a mum to cope would be to remember that these people don’t really matter.
For relatives, I have some advice for you. Visiting a mum with her newborn baby is a privilege. To watch that beautiful relationship developing at its earliest phase is a wonderful sight. Remember, that the baby is an extension of the mother, they are one unit- saying anything about the infant, makes the mum feel at fault, inadequate and angry. She cannot express these feelings to you – but after 9 months of carrying the baby and the long labour, she deserves an applause, not critical comments about her baby!
And dear mother, please learn to ignore such comments. It is another form of bullying – this time , unfortunately, it is through your baby.
Whatever anyone says- Your baby, with her dark eyes, her soft skin and her little fingers and toes is a gift. Remember she is precious and she is perfect!
The comments usually come from `well meaning’ relatives, who seem to forget that the woman is still vulnerable, has gone through hours of ordeal and is now sleepless and tired. Every baby is special and beautiful and I can understand the mother’s distress when someone comments about her.
Unfortunately, one cannot always stop people from talking. The best way for a mum to cope would be to remember that these people don’t really matter.
For relatives, I have some advice for you. Visiting a mum with her newborn baby is a privilege. To watch that beautiful relationship developing at its earliest phase is a wonderful sight. Remember, that the baby is an extension of the mother, they are one unit- saying anything about the infant, makes the mum feel at fault, inadequate and angry. She cannot express these feelings to you – but after 9 months of carrying the baby and the long labour, she deserves an applause, not critical comments about her baby!
And dear mother, please learn to ignore such comments. It is another form of bullying – this time , unfortunately, it is through your baby.
Whatever anyone says- Your baby, with her dark eyes, her soft skin and her little fingers and toes is a gift. Remember she is precious and she is perfect!
RSS Feed
